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Just a warning note here. This article is more of an op-ed piece than some sort
of how to. Though I will give some personal advice I am by no means some sort of
expert at finding a balance between career and home life.
It’s all about your career anymore. No matter who you are or what you do it’s
just about your career. I think I really became aware of it once I became a stay
at home mom. The question goes something like this, “So what do you do?” Often
asked with my child standing right next to me. My answer, “I”m a stay at home
mom.” Next comment goes something like this, “Oh, so what else do you do?” And
that’s the nice version sometimes it’s something like, “Oh is that all you do. I
wish I could be a stay at home mom and lie around all day.”
So that was the first wake up call for me to our modern “all about the career”
society. Next wake us occurred to my husband when he would turn down travel or
overtime to come home and spend time with his family. He received comments
something like, “I don’t know why you’d want to go home. Don’t you want to get
away from the wife and kid. Or don’t you care about your career?”
Ugh! Nice. As a single it didn’t really affect me because it was all about the
career then. Though looking back I do remember when I was planning my wedding
and still working in retail management. (Not a good career if you want any life
outside of work.) I remember then that I stopped working a lot of overtime and
always tried to get out on time as often as able. I was still doing my job and
doing it well I might add but I remember my boss’s reaction. She said, “Kelly
you don’t seem to care about your career here anymore.” Huh? I asked her if my
performance had changed and she said no. But to her it wasn’t performance it was
about staying at work and making it obvious that you had no other priorities
than work.
Even my husband his job performance was the same whether or not he worked
overtime or traveled more. So what was it that these corporations wanted?
They want you there, just there in case they feel they need or want you. They
want you to make it obvious that you are putting them first. Like some jealous
lover you must be on call, just in case. Doesn’t matter how wonderful you are to
them for eight or ten hours per day. It’s that one hour or moment that they
decide they want you there and maybe, God forbid, you spending time with your
family and you don’t come running when they call. It’s that time that will be
mentioned to you over and over and over again as evidence that you don’t care
about your career.
So what do you do? What do any of us do about it? That’s a hard one to answer. I
will say up front that some of the things I’m about to suggest may only be
options for very few of us. But it’s those few who can make a difference.
1. Do your work, however long your day, and when you’re home you are home! What
do I mean? Don’t be on call for jobs that don’t require it. Unless you’re in the
medical or emergency service you don’t need to answer the phone when work calls.
Voice mail and answering machines are wonderful devices, use them. I remember
when I was promoted to manager and told, “You do realize that you are on call
whenever the store is open now right?” I’m sorry but you don’t need to be on
call for a retail management job. There is no such thing as a retail emergency.
They actually expected me to be available 24/7 and always answer my phone.
Stupid me, I did! And that is where I’ve got this first tip. Just don’t answer
your phone once you’ve put in your day. Let them leave a message and listen to
it. If they really need you then you call back but you don’t pick up the phone
every time. I learned quickly that I was the only one of my management staff of
five who really did answer my phone and what did it get me. Constant phone
calls. The other managers screened calls. Everyone soon learned I was the “go
to” person and always available. Did I get a raise? No! I just got more work. I
don’t even think I got a thank you.
Continued on Work Life and Balance Part Two
Copyright 2007 Kelly Paal
Kelly Paal is a Freelance Nature and Landscape Photographer, exhibiting
nationally and internationally. She started her own business Kelly Paal
Photography. She has an educational background in photography, business, and
commercial art. Please visit www.kellypaalphotography.com for more FREE how to
articles.
